@OP, there is no such thing as a "best ROM/kernel". Everyone has different opinions/needs. The only way to find what's best for you is to head over to the dev sections and try a few, then decide for yourself which you liked the most.
XDA Developers was founded by developers, for developers. It is now a valuable resource for people who want to make the most of their mobile devices, from customizing the look and feel to adding new functionality. Are you a developer?