All, I was able to find a solution that worked for me. While in the car I can charge the phone, play music, and still answer calls hands free (with fully working two way communication) all from only the usb port.
I am running a TW based rom (Bean's R11 with Lean Kernel 0.9). I'm confident this will work in all TW roms and will most likely work in AOSP roms as well (although I haven't tried it).
The solution I used was to make a custom USB cable.
Our phone (along with almost every Android phone) uses a micro usb B port. A micro usb B port has 5 pins (Vcc, D-, D+, IDCON, GND).
http://pinoutsguide.com/CellularPhones-P-W/samsung_cell_micro_usb_pinout.shtml
The 3.5mm aux input in my car has 3 connectors (Tip, Ring, and Sleeve).
http://pinouts.ru/Home/Tele35s_pinout.shtml
Tip=Left Audio
Ring=Right Audio
Sleeve=signal gnd
This post pretty much sums it up
http://xdaforums.com/showpost.php?p=14846636&postcount=9
In a nutshell you connect pin 2 (D-) of the micro usb B connector to the left audio (tip), pin 3 (D+) to right audio (ring), pin 5 (GND) to the signal gnd (sleeve), and pin 4 (IDCON) to a large resistor (I used 470K ohm) which connects to pin 5 (GND). The resistor is absolutely needed in order to limit current.
To enable charging, connect a car charger Vcc (+5v) to pin 1 of the micro usb B connector (Vcc) and gnd to pin 5 (GND). As gnd in a car is ultimately going to the same place (chassis), we don't need to worry about differing grounds.
When you plug this cable into your phone, the presence of the resistor between IDCON and GND triggers the phone to enter "dock mode". If you go into settings, dock, and check "Output Audio Mode", then an analog audio signal will be output over the data lines (and GND) of the micro usb port.
This worked well in my car and did not mess with the bluetooth microphone.
This could also be adapted for an iphone connector (if your car doesn't have a convenient 3.5mm aux jack). See the pinout for details.
http://pinouts.ru/PortableDevices/ipod_pinout.shtml
I am going to order some electronic parts to make a nice clean cable that will last a while. When I get around to ordering the parts, I'll try to remember to post the list here.
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